In Defense of Child Care Workers

Being on both sides of the proverbial coin, as a parent and a childcare teacher, I feel I can provide some insight to the rest of the world’s parents who choose childcare centers for their children. Here is what you don’t know, what the director will never tell you, or what you may already feel in your gut but refuse to accept: 1. Your child’s caregiver DOES NOT get paid what you pay in weekly tuition per child they care for. You may feel that paying a high infant weekly rate entitles you to expect your child’s caregiver to move mountains for your infant. Reality: Your child’s teacher is probably hovering around minimum wage and has limited if any access via the center to affordable healthcare insurance and other benefits (including limited if any paid time off). Many centers do not require infant and toddler teachers to have degrees. These people are living paycheck to paycheck watching you in your stilettos drop off your precious infant and drive away, latte in one hand, iphone in the other, in your current year Range Rover. If the center is lucrative, said teacher is also then at ratio of caring for 4 infants at once. Do not accept subpar care of your child (i.e. not changing soiled diapers regularly, skipping feedings, etc.). However, if there is a hiccup in the teacher’s ability that day to tend to your child’s every cry, remember that said teacher is also balancing three other infants and their parents expectations. Insider Tip: When touring childcare centers, ask what pay and benefits the teachers get. Underpaid and over-worked employees may not be the best fit and burn out quickly, but good luck finding a childcare center where that is not the case. Maybe if enough parents expressed interest in the teachers’ pay, it would persuade administrators to make more attractive compensation packages for their underlings. If you have above average expectations about feedings, changings, positions and times held, then you should probably consider a nanny. In other words, if you expect your child to be changed every hour, have cream applied every changing, fed on demand, and held in a supine position for three hours a day, these are needs better met by someone who is hired to care for your child only. Also, an ounce of kindness is worth a pound of quality care. 2. For older kids, if you struggle at home to get your child to listen to you, develop good manners and be generally good, imagine having 10 of those for 8 hours every day. Reality: Your child’s teacher has been told “no” by 10 kids that day, likely frequently over the course of the day. Teaching manners and respect at home is the best gift you can give your child’s teacher. If you are exhausted with your "precious" spilling and not eating the food in front of them, times that by 10 and that is what a typical day is like for his teacher. Insider Tip: Talk to your child’s teacher and come together on what expectations are reasonable for your child in terms of table manners, what the teacher should expect your child to try (fruit, veggies) and what is unacceptable for your child to say or do when challenged by the teacher. If you throw in the towel and feed your child fast food and junk food at dinner to keep your sanity, don’t expect their teacher to get them to eat fruits and veggies at school. Do unto your child’s teacher what you would have them do unto you. 3. The nap conundrum. Many centers are napping centers, meaning all children are to lay down and nap for a period of time. This allows staff to take breaks since the child to teacher ratio is different when children are asleep. When parents request that their child not nap or take an abbreviated nap, and administration okays such a request, it undermines a teacher’s ability to have rules and structure. Many times, parents will make such a request and admit it is because the child is not sleeping at night. A child care teacher interprets it as the parents do not have the structure and discipline at home to enforce a bed time, or the parent is attempting to put the child to bed early for the parents’ benefit. Either way, it does not give the child’s teacher a favorable picture of your parenting. Insider tip: All children are different and some do not need naps as they get older, however, some do need an occasional or regular nap. Regardless, all children can rest for a period of time and have quiet individual play. It helps develop their ability to self-entertain as well as self-control and provides the teacher an opportunity to recharge her batteries for the afternoon. 4. Sick days and snow days: It is no secret that daycare is a challenge to a child’s immune system, especially in the infant stage. The common rule among centers is that a child must be fever/vomit/diarrhea free for 24 hours WITHOUT the aid of meds, such as Tylenol, before returning to the center. Most parents interpret this as their child can return the following day if they can mask the fever. Teachers understand the need to be at work to earn one’s living, however, teachers also have to be vigilant about the health of the other kids as well as themselves. Part of the reason illness spreads so rampantly at childcare centers is because parents bring in sick kids. Chances are good that once the Tylenol wears off, you are going to be called from work to pick up your sick child. Now you are missing work again, which you could have had more control over if you had taken the day off in the first place to make sure your child was well. As stated earlier, most child care teachers have very limited paid time off and limited if any health insurance. When constantly dealing with kids who are too sick too be at school, the teacher ends up getting sick and they cannot perform to their fullest or it forces them to miss work which puts everyone’s routine out of whack and often ends in a loss of pay for the teacher. The icing on the cake is when parents are visibly irritated that they have been called to pick up their sick child when they are well aware of the sick policy. It looks to the teacher as though you value your job above your child. Insider tip: Some cities do have hospitals that have a sick care for kids too sick to be at daycare, usually run by nurses if you have no other options for your child. Otherwise, if your job does not allow you the privilege to care for your sick child, arrange with a grandparent or family member to step in during those times. When it comes to snow days or days when the center is closed around holidays, there are always those parents who are put out that the center dare consider their staff’s safety in a storm situation or dare let them enjoy a holiday with their own families. Unless you plan to home school, the number of days a child will be out of school for breaks, teacher inservice days, bad weather, etc. are numerous in elementary school. Most extended care programs through elementary schools do not operate during those days. Day cares being open five days a week regardless of weather or Christmas being on a Wednesday gives parents a false sense of security that they will be able to work without interruption five days a week until their children are 18. Child care teachers are people too who have families, get sick, and value holidays. Again, do not accept subpar care of your child. There are definitely people in childcare who should not be, however, many do love their jobs and your children. Take the time to get to know your child’s teachers. If you really think about it, they spend more hours a week with your child than you do. If they try to discuss behavior issues, be open-minded. Do you really think they are out to get your child, or could it be that they are enlisting your help in observing and handling issues before they become major problems in the future? Childcare teachers are not your paid servants, they are your allies in raising your child.